Live Oscar-thon!

Good evening all!

It's 11.04 and we're just under two hours away from the beginning of the show!

The red carpet hits over the next couple of hours so ill keep you updated with the highs and lows.

First, I need a vanilla chai latte.

11.10 Fearne's out ready to interview whoever she can crack, although with day glow pink eyeshadow (bright enough to blind) she looks a bit over eager...

11.25 It's Dominic Cooper! Yep the one from The Duchess and also the one from Mamma Mia! I swear he has been on more red carpets than films. Something he seems slightly embarrassed by!
11.27 Sir Anthony Hopkins likes Fearne's eyeshadow..."It's original" he quips. I couldn't agree more.


11.38 Kevin Kline Four words. A Fish Called Wanda. Apparently Mr Kline is due to present an award this evening. That's the total extent of the excitement so far!

11.42 "I'll be like Superman, getting changed in the phone booth. Except there are no phone booths now because we all have cell phones." Classic. The delightful Taraji Henson.


11.48 The Slumdog Kids (TM) are out in force which is fantastic! They're all high on skittles, smarties or something similarly hyperactivating. Can you imagine how their lives have changed since the film was released in India?

00.00 Danny Boyle. Cotton: "What does it mean to you to win an Oscar?" Boyle: "I don't know, I haven't won one!" Humble to the end.

00.04 Michael Shannon of Revolutionary Road ilk. The man does not cry!

00.12 It's another Michael...Michael Sheen this time. Why was he not nominated? "I've heard that they're really going for it tonight..." Interesting. Ooooh Ahhhh

00.19 Robert Pattinson (Twilight Vampire). I'll be honest, he has nothing to say (which is exactly what he says).

00.20 Fearne's watched Mamma Mia on DVD four times. There are a few problems with that statement. BUT WAIITTTTT! It's AMY ADAMMMMSSS! Highlight of the night already, though she has a really revolting piece of neckwear going on...

00.23 Sarah Jessica Parker & Matthew Broderick. She's wearing Dior, he looks like he doesn't give a toss. How about a Ferris Bueller sequel eh? Any takers for 'Ferris Bueller: Struck Off Work'?

00.25 Josh Brolin. Great in Milk. If he won an Oscar he would send it to the Coen's...right...

00.26 Ben Kingsley. It's going crazy now. Kingsley, stately as ever sporting a gangster beard-moustache combination. Favourite film: Slumdog Millionaire. After the show he'll be ''having a beverage." MARRRRISSAAAA TOMEEEIIII sporting an L-neck topped ivory dress. That's a new one! She's asked by Miss Cotton if 'The Wrestler' is the best film she has made. An understandingly flummoxed Tomei eventually replies that "it may just be..."

What better than 'The Guru'? Surely not...

00.32 Mickey Rourke. "I don't know what's gonna come out. I'm a bit absent minded." [ENTER OBVIOUS GENIUS SPEECH REMARK].

00.35 The real David Frost. He seems happy enough with Frost/Nixon. Maybe it nudged him gently into a light slumber.

00.37 Peter Gabriel. He isn't performing tonight because the Oscars titted the performing of his song. Fairplay.

00.44 I hate Claudia Winkleman and I'm not too fond of Gok Wan too... Brangelina have arrived. Mrs Pitt-Jolie looks rather regal really. Ohh and Fearne Cotton hasn't managed to grab the Cruzster. Must try harder.

10 minutes to showtime!

00.55 Brad waves hello to the UK. He's got five minutes to get in. Better run, Lt. Raine.

Right, I'm not blogging the red carpet now. NOPE! WAIT! Winslet. Save the best to last! I hope she wins for Revolutionary Road...ohh wait. She's wearing Yves Saint Laurent. Excellent.

Right, definately off. Back in a bit for the real deal.

01.05 HERE WE GO. ITS THE 81ST ANNUAL ACADEMY AWARDS!

Nope, not yet. First some Winkleman-Wan-Wankery.

Freida Pinto: Galliano. Good, not great.
Heidi Klum: Dior Galliano. Nice.
Amy Adams: Carolina Herrera. No No.
Sarah Jessica Parker: Dior Couture. Apparently needs some hair product.
Taraji Henson: Alberto Ferreti.
Marisa Tomei: Versace. Looks amazing. I agree.
Anne Hathaway: Armani (with a million quid worth of bling).
Kate Winslet: YSL. Always gets it right. Kate "lives in her body" according to Wan. Spooky.
Natalie Portman: Pink on red. This years look apparently.
Angelina Jolie: Wan likes it but...

The fashion review right there in a little nugget. Not my views, just Gok's. He KNOWS apparently.

01.28 A midnight menagerie. Idle thumbs. Fresh impetus. Invigorated outlook. And, here...we...go!

01.34 And here's our host, Hugh Jackman (Sexiest Man Alive). "I would swim a sea of excrement!"

The Reader in a quasi-Kraftwerk posterior. Who woulda funked it?

"IIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMM WOOOOOOOOLLLLLLVEEEERRRRIIIIIINNNNNNEEE!"

01.43 Jackman informs us that he is contractually obligated to mention Brangelina at least five times tonight. Four to go.

01.46 Introduction to Actress in a Supporting Role. Oscar has shaken up things here by bringing past winners on the stage to describe each of this year's nominations. Different, though I don't think it's a move which will make the Oscars shorter. Onstage luminaries include Angelica Huston, Tilda Swinton & Whoopi Goldberg.

And the Oscar goes to... Penelope Cruz! Yay!

"Has anyone ever fainted here?! I might be the first one!" Truly deserved. Slight water work burst followed by a twist of Espanola. I just love me an overwhelmed winner.

For the only other 50:50 acting award we have to wait for Leading Actor methinks.

01.55 Steve Martin & Tina Fey. Some witty banter then, Original Screenplay.

And the Oscar goes to... Dustin Lance Black (Milk). The best of the picture nominees so I'm glad it won (though Wall-E would've been a nice surprise also).

"God does love you." Amen to that.

02.01 Adapted Screenplay. Hmm will it be someone other than Simon Beaufoy? If it is I will burn the hair on my feet...

My feet live to walk another day as Simon Beaufoy wins. He looks as surprised as a male snake who has just been told he will be made into shoes at the earliest available opportunity. Therefore not very. Slumdog Millionaire is one for one.

02.06 Jack Black bets all his money (earned from work on Dreamworks productions) on Pixar. Good call Mr Black, good call. This not-so-secret tip leads us to Animated Feature which Wall-E will win. There I said it ok! Sorry to curtail any suspense...

Wall-E wins. Should have been in the Best Picture category. Baaaah Humbug.

Animated Short -La Maison En Petit Cubes. I haven't seen any of the shorts but I want to!

02.16 The background music is cloyingly annoying! Why do we need neo-jazz over the top of the award for Art Direction? Daniel Craig & Sarah Jessica Parker battle to get a word in.

And the Oscar goes to... The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. So it does win at least one award tonight. There was a possibilty (although distinct) it could have gone home empty handed.
Costume Design - Right, I get the picture. They are bundling the techies together in some sort of filmmaking narrative, which is time saving but unrequiringly glib. Kinda gives the impression that these awards matter less somehow. Taste Mouth Bitter In.

And the Oscar goes to... The Duchess which wins by default as it was the only one with 'out there' costume design.

Make-Up Design - The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button. Well done to this crew, terrific work all round to make Brad Pitt look quasi-pubescent. No matter how difficult that sounds (sticky jealousy).

02.25 Robert Pattinson & umm...The girl in Mamma Mia, Amanda Seyfried, introduce the best of Romance in 2008. How odd...will there be a best of narcotic teenagers segment later on?

02.32 Natalie Portman & a jungle-bearded Ben Stiller/Joaquin Phoenix introduce Cinematography. Anthony Dod Mantle (Slumdog Millionaire) grabs the gong. But you knew that already, did you not?

02.39 Jessica Biel presented the Sci-Tech Academy Awards. I'm not to sure why she presented it but good on the girl. If you have an open diary, host the tech awards!

02.42 Another 'best of' segment, this time Comedy with the Pineapple Express guys. Hilarious James Franco/Seth Rogan/Milk joke.

They then come on stage with Janusz Kaminski (Schinder's List framer) to present Live Action Short which goes to Spielzeugland (Toyland). Well done.

02.53 Hugh Jackman &...Beyonce Knowles in a old fashioned cabaret number which morphs into Grease & other assorted musicals. I've now seen it all. No I haven't as here come real-life couple Zac Efron & Vanessa Hudgens and not-so-real couple Dominic Cooper and Amanda Seyfired to help out. That was created by Baz Luhrmann by the way.

03.01 As I enter my fourth hour, the Actor in a Supporting Role descriptions begin. Christopher Walken, Kevin Kline, Alan Arkin, Joel Grey & Cuba Gooding Jr do the honours. Just the image of Heath Ledger makes my hands clammy and my spirit tremble. Nervous...

And he wins.

Followed by a montage on Documentary of 2008.

03.14 Can I just say Werner Herzog is a genius. Well I have! Grizzly Man was top, top documentary filmmaking. The winner this year is, Man On Wire which is as worthy winner as any film this year. Philippe Petit, ever the showman!

03.18 Smile Pinky wins Documentary Short.

03.23 It's Action 2008. RAAAWWWKK ME BAABBY. YEEEHHHHAAAWW! Half of these films are terrible!

03.25 Big Willie comes on to present Outstanding Visual Effects. Won of course for some astonishing work in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

03.28 Sound Editing. Ooh interesting one. Will Slumdog keep up it's sweeping course? NO! The Dark Knight wins. Makes sense to me.

03.32 Sound Mixing. Wall-E contains un-bel-ievable sound mixing and should win. But Slumdog Millionaire wins. How strange then that it didn't win Sound Editing. You would think they would go hand in hand!

03.35 Film Editing. Slumdog Millionaire wins! I'm so happy I want to kick a dog. Actually this one is well deserved. The editing truly made this film. Four wins out of five so far for the Mumbai movie.

03.43 The Jean Hersholt Award to Jerry Lewis. Love his role in Scorcese's King of Comedy.

03.50 Original Score expertly played by the in-house orchestra. Out come Alicia Keys & Zac Efron to present. A.R Rahman wins for Slumdog Millionaire.

John Legend comes on to sing Down To The Ground from Wall-E (written by Peter Gabriel & Thomas Newman). The song is flanked by the two Slumdog nominees (Jai Ho & Oh Saiya). The ending is the strangest combination of the night. No contest.

04.01 Original Song. Jai Ho wins. I thought the Slumdog pair would split the vote but alas I am wrong! That makes six wins. It's got two more to come (Picture & Director) and it's favourite for both.

04.05 Liam Neeson & Freida Pinto come-a-prancing to present the award for Foreign Language Film. Departures (Japan) wins!!! Probably the biggest shock of the night so far. I had Waltz With Bashir, The Class and The Baader-Meinhof Komplex ahead of Departures.

In Memoriam...to those who will stay with us for all of time...

04.19 Reese Witherspoon arrives with swan-like grace to present the first of the four big 'uns, Directing. Danny Boyle wins his first and seventh for Slumdog Squarepants. He bounces up and down on the stage, a reference to Tigger from Winnie the Pooh. Winkleman and her merry crew are overjoyed.

04.25 No let up now, Actress in a Leading Role. Last year's winner Marion Cotillard was an unexpected pleasure, same again this year?

Halle Berry, the aforementioned Marion Cotillard, Sophia Loren et al arrive on stage.

Kate Winslet for The Reader. Wrong film, right actress. 'Nuff said really.

04.36 Actor in a Leading Role. OK now I'm seriously excited. I haven't got a clue. Who did I predict. Penn you say? Could be a tie in my view. Both performances just elevate each other's performance to that next step of greatness.

Out come an ostentatious group of actors. Robert De Niro, Sir Ben Kingsley, Anthony Hopkins, Adrian Brody & Michael Douglas. Wow.

Sean Penn wins! Harvey Milk will be remembered forever and Penn has a huge part in that. It's Penn's second win and even though his reputation as a great actor was already secured this just solidifies the status further. Well done Sean! (Mickey your turn will come).

04.47 The 'Berg comes out to draw a close to proceedings. I'll eat my telly if Slumdog doesn't win. I'm rooting for Milk. Best Picture is won by. . . Slumdog Millionaire! Well done to the cast and crew who are all on the stage (and some drape just off centre).

Eight awards. Slumdog is topdog tonight and 2008.

I'm off to bed! Thanks to the few who stayed up and checked out the live blog!